The Truth

A part of me feels like I need to make sure everyone is really clear on something: I am not spending donations on leisure activities. The generosity I have seen make me feel very blessed and I would never want anyone to think that I am taking advantage of that. So, thank you for everyone's continued support and that trip to do the safari came from a birthday gift. Being able to experience that was probably never going to be an option again so it seemed like a nice thing to treat myself to, especially among all the other changes that have happened in my life recently.
That being said, Cape Town is worth visiting, just thought I should put that out there. Yes, I know it takes days to get there by plane but there is so much to do and see it is fully worth it. I was wearing my Blue Jays cap the other day and I met a couple from Toronto that was visiting. That made me so happy and I got to tell them about the ship and they were very impressed. That is why, no matter how my hometown teams perform, I am always representing them; it brings people together.
We wrapped up the days of invite tours on the ship and all my standing outside got me a pretty nice tan. I was greeting people at the security gate and chatting with passersby who had questions or wanted a brochure. I have been told that the PR has really benefitted the recruiting effort here in South Africa; many applications have been received in the past few days. This is great news because as we prepare to get the new ship staffed, the bigger our alumni base the better!
Although I have been having a great time here in Cape Town there is a part of me that is getting a little tired. I see people reuniting with their families, and old friends and I long for that familiar face. The people on the ship are definitely becoming closer to my heart everyday but I still have to tread lightly and find myself apologizing for making a comment that people don't understand because they don't understand me, or my very odd sense of humour. As the days go by I continue to wonder what exactly I am doing here and where to direct my energy. There is so much that goes on that I feel conflicted on a daily basis on whether to engage, or to have the sense to take some time to separate myself from the crowd and sort through my feelings, or create memories on my own.
This is real life for me and that is so hard right now. There will be no Thanksgiving celebration; no stress cooking, setting the table, trying new vegetarian recipes, and the inevitable feeling that although some moments feel incredibly frustrating and hectic, I don't want the day to end. I am thankful for each and every member of my family, who they are, and how they have helped me become who I am today.
Just because I wish I were home sometimes does not at all mean that where I am right now is not where I am supposed to be. Everyday has its challenges whether I am at home or on the ship.
I am so thankful that we have phones so that I can call my mom and have the sound of her voice just turn my mood from grumpy to grateful!
I know that was a little all over the place but that's what's going on right now and that's the truth!
This weekend should be jam packed with activities before we get ready to sail next week. I'll report back soon!
Thank you to every person who reads these words; near or far, familiar or foreign, I am so thankful to have you with me.